Working from home day count: 11
Current Work Context: Coaching an IT Digital Workplace department of 11 people. One team, all working remotely from home. The whole company is working from home.
What brought me to write this post?
It’s been 3 weeks since we started having daily meetings to get in sync about how work is progressing, what’s on the team’s way to do their job, ask for help to collaborate and check-in how everyone feels like. The team has being consistently meeting every day, doing their best to get in sync and help each other. Today’s meeting was going great, until somebody asked me by chat if I could take control back of the meeting, because from its perspective, the meeting was being derailed from its main purpose, which is get in sync. Immediately, without thinking I got in the middle of the conversation between two team members to cut it dry, impose myself and create discomfort. The impact of my intervention was bad, people shat down and radio silence took place.
Timing is a sensitive thing
I saw several signs that helped me see that my intervention caused the opposite effect I intended to create:
- The conversation stopped immediately.
- The room went silent
- People turned off their video cameras
- I felt something was wrong
- It was an uncomfortable moment that last 3 or 4 seconds.
- The tone of the meeting changed (before my intervention, it was convivial, light and smooth. After it, radio silence and bad mood)
What I was trying to do once I decided to intervene, was to play the facilitator role, and I was doing properly until I reacted without thinking to someone else’s invitation, to control the flow of the conversation.
That has made me wonder:
- How many times have I reacted to someone else’s s need to keep under control a given situation?
- How many frustration have I caused into others when acting like that?
- What kind of leader have I being when acting this way?
- How am I helping others to take ownership of their acts if I do what they need to do?
- How is that type of behavior serving others to grow and fight their own fears?
What if …..
- I empower others do what they feel needs to be done?
- I keep building self-awareness to be able to guide others take ownership of their own acts?
- I invite myself to see the forest instead of the tree? What would be possible?
My invitation is to be careful with timing, show vulnerability and apologize with those you have hurt
I did apologize this morning to the whole team because the way I cut the flow of the conversation was totally unacceptable and out of range. That act of vulnerability was enough to help the person, who first asked me to take control of the meeting, to take responsibility of its action and apologize to the team too.
As I always say, I have a lot to learn and I feel grateful for that.
Now that you know a little bit more about myself, I invite you to take a moment to look around, staying curious, being brave, spreading love to reflect about the following questions:
- What mechanisms do you use to be careful with timing your interventions?
- What do you do to show vulnerability to others?
- What recent behavior needs an apology?
- What is holding you back from helping others take care of their own actions?
Stay at home, take a break to relax, keep yourself safe, and remember that:
We are incredibly better together, today more than ever!